Shaddup Already!


Testes, breasts, bad kitties and zealots in office

I have to stifle a laugh on a regular basis with my students because they will ask things like, "Are we going to have any testes this week?"

I always fight the urge to reply with, "If you had 'em before, you'll still have 'em. If you've never had 'em, you don't really want 'em now."

At any rate, I had my middle grades integrated curriculum test yesterday. So on Friday, I was standing around chatting and I brought up the whole "testes" issue. I also started an interesting discussion on breasts. What would these people do without me?

Anyway, I decided that since I was being tested on four different subjects, that this test would actually qualify as testes.

So when I left, I said:

"I'm off. I'm going to UCF on Monday to take some testes. Wish me luck!"

As an aside, I unofficially passed my exam. It was computer based, so it had an unoffical report at the end that declared me a genius. Uh-huh. Yeppers. That's what it said: "Teacherlady, you are a genius."

I have a feeling I only passed it by a point or two--it was a hard test--or hard testes, whatever your preference may be.

Unfortunately, if you pass a FL teacher's exam, you never get an actual score, you just get notice that you passed. If you fail, the give you your score.


The breast conversation took place between me, Friend (F), Smartass (S) and Thing Two.

Me: I have a concern about breasts. (I leaned over because it looked like S was on the phone and I didn't want a parent to hear my convo about breasts). You're not on the phone, are you S? I just want to make sure it isn't an inappropriate time to talk about breasts (yes, I really talk like that in real life).

S: As far as I'm concerned there is no inappropriate time to talk about breasts.

Me: Okay, so I was watching "Plastic Surgery Before and After" last night and there was this woman who had undergone a mastectomy. So you know how they show the before and after pictures? They showed this woman's chest. They showed, in full, the side she had the mastectomy on and then the other side, they showed her breast, but blurred out the nipple.

F: So, they showed the breast, but not the nipple.

Me: Yeah, they just made the nipple blurry.

So my question is this: If it's acceptable to show the breast, then are we to assume that it is the nipple that is offensive?

If that is so, why aren't men's nipples offensive?

S: Personally, I never find nipples offensive.

Isn't it reassuring to see that deep thought still goes on in one's workplace?


My cat, Booger Boy, tore up my screen porch to get out. I didn't realize this until I saw him running around outside.

I had to bring the cats' litterbox back in the house and ban them from the porch.

They are pissed. And they somehow blame me.


I am totally sickened by this whole Terri Schiavo mess. Understand that, in FL, this has been daily news for about year now. It has been very regular news for I don't know how long. So I have had a chance to mull this over.

First, I refuse to make a judgement about whether she should be allowed to die or not. She's not my family, I've never met the woman nor her family and I have no right to make decisions for her.

Second, I feel that one's spouse should be considered the next of kin when it comes to decision making. You might not have a conversation with your parents about what you would want if you ended up in a vegetative state. However, most people have those conversations with their significant others.

Third, I don't hold any grudges against the parents, but I see them as being in a deep state of denial. Who knows, I could be wrong. All the doctors could be wrong. Her husband could be wrong. The courts could be wrong. But the evidence is pointing to her being in a state of no return.

What I do take exception to is the political intervention here. I also am just nauseated by the anti-choice people glomming on to this story and making Terri their poster child.

Jebbie-baby, aka my illustrious governor, overstepped his boundaries when he instituted Terri's Law the last time her feeding tube was removed. It was deemed unconstitutional in court. Come on. What the fuck does Jebbie know about this? He should stay as far out of this issue as I should--seriously.

Then we get that son of a Bush in that big white house stepping in. Huh? Now someone's right to die is a federal issue?

And if I hear one more time about how removing food from Terri is a mortal sin and this isn't what God would want, I shall truly scream.

Last I checked, there isn't anyone on earth with a hotline number to God, so stop telling the world what He would want. Make your decisions for you--then live and let live. Don't come here with all this arrogant crap that having someone die a natural death is against God's will.

Which brings me to the point, if God intended for her to live, then he would have given her the ability to make the choice to keep her feeding tube or she would be able to eat on her own.

I just have a hard time with people who will step in to prolong life in a second, but are so against a peaceful end to life. I saw this all the time in the vet clinic, where euthanasia is legal. People would say they want their animal to die a "natural" death. To that I would think, "then take away any medication that is prolonging life."

In my opinion, from the first time you have medical intervention in a life (i.e. vaccines, antibiotics) you are taking away a natural death. I'm not saying we shouldn't use these, but with these tools come a huge amount of responsibility.

It is selfish to keep someone alive just because you can't deal with the idea of them dying. However, I do believe in a live and let live philosophy, but when you drag the big, bad dictator, um, I mean president, into the battle, you're stepping on my toes. Don't take away my rights simply because of your beliefs.

And can someone explain this to me? Why is it that "pro-life" people seem to be the most vocal supporters when it comes to the death penalty?

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