Shaddup Already!



English teachers should not be allowed to go into bookstores unsupervised. When we enter, our eyes glaze over, we forget to swallow and then the drool starts to roll down our chins. As we breathe in the smell of new books and freshly printed ink, we lose what is left of our senses. We wander to the aisle of our choice and begin to pluck the helpless tomes from their shelves.

The next thing we know, we are squintng against the sun as we walk out to the car. The bag that has somehow appeared in our hand is heavy, heavier than it should be. We blink back tears as we look at the receipt and wonder how we're going to afford to feed the cats this month.

Okay, so I exagerrate slightly, I'm usally wearing sunglasses, so I don't have to squint into the sunlight.

I went to Books a Million today looking for a particular book. I was just going to get that book and if it wasn't there, I was going to turn around and leave. I told this to my service dog in training. I gave her the command, "don't let me spend!" She ignored it and fell asleep as I was reading backs of books. She didn't even awaken when the tower of books I was carrying toppled. What a service dog she is!

Seriously, I was shopping as a teacher, yeah, that's it.

See I decided a while ago that I was going to invest my book money in young adult books. There are many benefits to this--they cost between $4 and $6 (which means I can buy even more), they have the same probability of being good as a "grown-up" book would have, they are quick reads, I intend to write a young adult book (so I need to read as many as possible) and I can write them off on my taxes. This is how I justify spending more money than I have on books.

This is what I got:

Cut by Patricia McCormick
The Leap by Jonathan Stroud
The Library Card by Jerry Spinelli
Blister by Susan Shreve

Actually I'm proud of myself because I didn't buy more than that. Believe me, I almost did.

Now I'm going to drown myself in teen angst and forget about the money.

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